Posts

Showing posts with the label unconscionable

Iris Apfel: An Ode

Image
“Now when I walk down Fifth Avenue in the summertime I just want to throw up. It seems that the fatter and uglier people are, the fewer clothes they wear. The shorts and flip-flops and tight jeans on butts that go from here to Poughkeepsie.  I always say they should put people in jail for wearing clothes like that. Especially stretch jeans over [US] size 10 - they should be outlawed. Ten years ago people were starting to look like slobs in New York, now it's an epidemic.” Not that she would ever intervene on a bad case of misjudged style. “Oh, now that would be horrible. It's a free country - if you want to look like a freak, that's your problem. “Most of the young people today look dreadful. And celebrities look even worse. They don't know what to do with themselves. “At the Golden Globes and Oscars they all look alike - it seems like they're all wearing the same nightgown and this year nobody had any jewellery at all. “I mix everything up. A museum curat...

Annoying: Cases in Point

Image
Context: this chick graduated with you.  I remember mentioning her back when we were freshman, because she was annoying already. 1.   This article kicks off our tour of annoying. But it’s not all about $250 skinny jeans, luxury handbags, and dancing on tables at Bungalow 8. These young swans, who attend Spence, Chapin, Nightingale, or have just matriculated at one of the country’s top colleges, have serious interests—in history, literature, journalism, science, and even math. When it comes to good works and galas, they are already walking the walk—or, at least, the catwalk—strutting for such charities as Teens Against Cancer, Fashion for Fistula, and Operation Smile. And they are not lacking in self-confidence. “We know so much more. We’re so much more cultured,” says one now in college, about growing up in their distinctive milieu. “[In college] you meet people who don’t even know how to pronounce ‘Prada.’” 2.  She got an invitation to the McQueen costume gala. A...

More genocide.

Image
Dreamt I squished a giant, translucent, female silverfish which was pregnant with twins (because clearly silverfish are mammals).  She died right away, oozing blood and gross fluids by the liter.  Last but not least, the two babies/fetuses (what is the plural of fetus? Is it 3rd declension?) were launched out her "asshole," slathered in red silverfish blood. This has been the most unconscionable event since my last silverfish nightmare.