Ren. Or Stimpy. Can't remember which is which.

This article is kind of mediocre, except for this one section, which I will excerpt below.

BLOG BROS

Motherfucker, nobody wants to hear Alt-J on their birthday. Not even members of Alt-J want to hear Alt-J on their birthday. Yet there's always some guy (never a girl) who wants to hear "just one song" at a party. The reason he wants to hear this song is because he is under the mistaken impression that this will make him look cool. He reckons that people's ears will prick up like that bit when they play the Beta Band in High Fidelity, that the girls and cooler guys will come rushing to him and ask, "Just what IS this magical song you've parachuted into my life!?" And he will calmly reply: "Alt-J," with the unmistakable confidence of a man who knows what the fuck he's talking about.

Oh, how wrong he is. This man is only ever answered with the knees of the dancers stiffening up in confusion, people will suddenly remember they need a piss or a cigarette, the dancefloor John Peel himself will be reduced to the state of a man who's told a joke that doesn't make sense or a street performer who's fallen off their unicycle. And yet they still insist on being at every fucking party I go to.